Love, Life and death

Five days ago, I was saddened by the news of the sudden demise of the wife of a friend.

He was a client of mine when I was working in a bank during the last millenium. Through the years we developed quite a rapport and got to know bits and pieces about each other's personal lives. However the `relationship' (if you may call it that) went into hiatus when I left my employment.

I was delighted to receive an invitation from both him and the wife a couple of years back. Being stranded in an unexpected traffic jam, I was about a half hour late for the appointment and the tea which was prepared for me had gone cold together with the kuih. But the reception I got from the couple was much much warmer than the tea. What surprised me though was the fact that it was not the wife I knew from before. For you late bloomers, in simple words, he had taken a new wife!

Later I got to know that he had married her when her husband passed away, leaving her with 4 young kids.Unable to accept being `honeyed', the first wife with whom he has 3 children , filed and obtained a divorce. During the time we did not keep in touch, he and the new wife had 3 children together.

Now, that makes it 10 children between them, some of whom are his, the rest are hers and theirs. There was a family potrait of them with their ten children, which drew a remark from me, ~Mesti meriah kat rumah ni!' Their joint reply was, `Ya , kalau depa semua ada memang meriah'. As it was, only the younger 4 children were with them as all the rest were either in Jordan, Syria or Egypt studying. Imagine having six children studying the Quran, Usuluddin and Syariah! I said a silent prayer for all of them.

News of her sudden death of a stroke at the age of 41 left me sad. Knowing full well that we belong to God the sadness was not due to her untimely passing but for the 4 children she had with her previous husband.

As I look at my nieces and nephews who came to stay during the CNY break, I can only imagine the helplessness the children may feel.

For his children, they may have lost their mother during the divorce, but she is still around to share their ups and downs. For their children, they still have their father although they have lost their mother. But for her children, they have lost their father early on, experienced their mother re-marrying another, and now losing her and leaving them to stay with their step father.

I pray to GOD that my friend will be blessed with the courage to bring up the children with hikmah and that GOD will pave a way for him to carry such a big burden.

I am reminded of God's words, that we are tried only to the extent of our ability to handle the problems and pray that God will help him along the way.

Nasihat kepada a 14 year old who thinks she is in love

Ini sebagai pengajaran...jangan kita ingat apa yang kita buat tak ada kesan. Setiap perbuatan ada `repercussion'.

Kita ingin menduniakan jurnal kita, tapi hati kita tak cukup kuat untuk menerima pandangan/ kritikan orang terhadap apa yang kita tulis, malah pandangan orang terhadap kita sebagai seorang insan yang baru nak bertatih dalam kehidupan.

Fifi Ain bt J...masanya dah tiba untuk Fifi Ain lupakan alam fantasi dan kembali ke realiti. Fifi Ain anak yatim yang perlu berusaha untuk memantapkan diri, berusaha untuk melonjakkan keluarga KEDUA Allahyarham J B ke tahap yang lebih baik (sekurang2nya sebaik keluarga PERTAMA Allahyarham)...bukan sekadar anak yatim yang kekurangan perhatian dan material, tinggal bersama ibu yang mengusahakan sebuah warung. Bukan sekadar anak dara yang akan menambah statistik anak muda kawin bawah umur di negeri Perlis.

Sekian...Ini nasihat terakhir dari Maknjang, biar Fifi Ain rasa cara ini kejam, ini semua untuk menyedarkan Fifi Ain bahawa semua orang ingin melihat Fifi Ain menjadi orang yang berjaya di dunia dan akhirat serta insan beradab mulia seperti mana Aruah Abah Fifi Ain mahu.

Cinta boleh tunggu...takut cinta yang kita agung2kan tu menyebabkan kita menjadi monyet cinta.

Sabarlah...dewasa dan tua akan datang tanpa digamit. Sabar dan nikmatilah hidup sebagai anak yang taat, pelajar yang pintar dan berjaya, kemudiannya sebagai dewasa yang dihormati. Nanti, jika ada jodoh dan si Akim masih cintakan Fifi Ain, kawin lah. Siapa pun takkan mengahalang, tapi masanya bukan sekarang. Dan jika dia jujur dan ikhlas dengan Fifi Ain dia akan sedar bahawa budak 14 tahun tak tahu dan paham apa erti cinta.


Ingat, dunia ini kecil dan bertambah kecil dengan setiap kesalahan dan kesilapan yang kita lakukan.

2010 November 28 08:17